How to Talk to Your Partner About Bringing Toys Into the Bedroom
Bringing up toys with a partner can feel like walking a tightrope — exciting but nerve-wracking. Here’s how to do it without the awkwardness.
Reframe the Conversation
Toys aren’t a replacement — they’re enhancement. Like adding hot sauce to a great meal.
Try saying:
- “I read about this toy and thought it could be fun for us to try together.”
- “I want to explore more with you — what do you think about trying something new?”
- “This isn’t about what we’re missing, it’s about what we could add.”
Pick the Right Moment
❌ Not during sex (too much pressure)
❌ Not right after an argument
✅ During a relaxed, private moment — maybe over wine or on a walk
Start Small
Don’t lead with a massive strap-on and a BDSM kit. Start with:
- A couples’ vibrator (like the We-Vibe Chorus)
- A vibrating cock ring (mutual pleasure, minimal intimidation)
- A small bullet you can use together
Address Common Concerns
“Will it replace me?”
- “No way. This is about us exploring together. You’re what makes it hot.”
“Is this because I’m not enough?”
- “Absolutely not. I love what we do. I just want to see what else we could enjoy.”
“I don’t know how to use it.”
- “We’ll figure it out together. That’s half the fun.”
Shop Together
Make it part of foreplay! Browse our site together, read reviews, and pick something that excites you both.
Recommended Pick for Today
🍭 We-Vibe Chorus — a couples’ vibrator worn during intercourse, stimulating both partners simultaneously. Perfect for first-timer couples.
Tomorrow: The beginner’s guide to vibrators — finding your buzz.